Wow, this speaks to me. Lately for a while I've been 'faced with the condition that is actually my existence', the condition of who I really am and to be honest, I was hating myself. Shocked that anger like that could actually come from me, those hurtful words and that tone? Who was I becoming?
It was like thinking I'm quite attractive and then seeing a mirror for the first time ever - who's that ugly face?
I didn't realize I've been hurting myself by not embracing who I am. I'm disgusting and I should be constantly looking at God with amazement...me? me Lord? Surely You wouldn't have chosen me for Your Son's inheritance. To wear His robe over my filthy shoulders.
Instead I hid my sin thinking that if I wasn't perfect, I'd be hurting my testimony. What testimony? I don't even evangelize.
